8 WAYS TO MOTIVATING YOURSELF FROM THE SCRATCH

Earlier today, I posted about guidelines to motivating yourself rightly. Now, we'll take a tour on 8 solid and practicable ways we can motivate ourselves from the scratch. Read on please...

You know what's great? Starting out with the
right motivation, because a good start can build up momentum that can last for a very, very long
time. If you start out right, you have much chances of succeeding, so here are 8 simple great tips to help you start out right;

1. Start small: Don't try to start out big! Start
out with a ridiculously easy goal, and then grow from there. If you want to exercise, for example, you may be thinking that you have to do these
intense workouts 5 days a week. No * instead, do small, tiny, baby steps. Just do 2 minutes of exercise. I know, that sounds wimpy. But it works. Commit to 2 minutes of exercise for one week. You may want to do more, but just stick to 2
minutes. It's so easy, you can't fail. Do it at the same time, every day. Just some crunches, 2 pushups, and some jogging in place. Once you've done 2 minutes a day for a week, increase it to 5, and stick with that for a week. In a month, you'll be doing 15-20. Want to wake up early? Don't think about waking at 5 a.m. Instead, think about waking 10 minutes earlier for a week. That's all. Once you've done that, wake 10 minutes earlier than that. Baby steps.

2. One goal. Too many people start with too many goals at once, and try to do too much. And it saps energy and motivation. It's probably the most common mistake that people make. You cannot maintain energy and focus (the two most
important things in accomplishing a goal) if you are trying to do two or more goals at once. It's not possible. You have to choose one goal, for now, and focus on it completely. I know, that's hard. You can always do your other goals when you've accomplished your One Goal.

3. Examine your motivation . Know your reasons. Give them some thought * and write them down. If you have loved ones, and you are doing it for them, that is more powerful than just doing it for
self-interest. Doing it for yourself is good too, but you should do it for something that you REALLY REALLY want to happen, for really good reasons.

4. Really, really want it. This is essentially the same as the above tip, but I want to emphasize it: it's not enough to think it would be cool to achieve something. It has to be something you're passionate about, something you're super excited about, something you want
deeply. Make sure that your goal meets
these criteria, or you won't stick with it for long.

5. Commit publicly. None of us likes to look bad in front of others. We will go the extra mile to do something we've said publicly. For example, when I wanted to run my first marathon, I started writing a column about it in my local daily newspaper. The entire island of Guam (pop. 160K) knew about my goal. I couldn't back down, and even though my motivation came and went, I
stuck with it and completed it. Now, you don't have to commit to your goal in your daily newspaper, but you can do it with friends and family and co-workers, and you can do it on your blog if you have one. And hold yourself accountable — don't just commit once, but commit to giving progress updates to everyone
every week or so.

6. Get excited . Well, it starts with inspiration from others (see above), but you have to take that excitement and build on it. For me, I've learned that by talking to my wife about it, and to others, and reading as much about it as possible, and visualizing what it would be like to
be successful (seeing the benefits of the goal in my head), I get excited about a goal. Once I've done that, it's just a matter of carrying that energy forward and keeping it going.

7. Build anticipation. This will sound hard, and many people will skip this tip. But it really works. It helped me quit smoking after many failed attempts. If you find inspiration and want to do a goal, don't start right away. Many of us will get excited and want to start today. That's a mistake. Set a date in the future— a week or two, or even a month — and make that your Start Date. Mark it on the calendar. Get excited about that date.
Make it the most important date in your life. In the meantime, start writing out a plan. And do some of the steps below.

Because by delaying your start, you are
building anticipation, and increasing your
focus and energy for your goal.

8. Print it out, post it up. Print out your goal in big words. Make your goal just a few words long, like a mantra ("Exercise 15 mins. Daily"), and post it up on your wall or refrigerator. Post it at home and work. Put it on your computer desktop. You want to have big reminders about your goal, to keep your focus and keep your excitement going. A picture of your goal (like a model with sexy abs, for example) also helps.

Has any of these approaches worked out for you? Please share with us. And if you have any other way, please do share with us as well.

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GUIDELINES TO MOTIVATING YOURSELF TO ACHIEVE ANY GOAL

One of the biggest challenges in achieving
any goal is finding motivation and sticking to it.

Henry Ford has this to say, "Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal".

Motivation is the key to achieving any goal
but finding that motivation and sticking to it, day in and day out, is not easy.

What Motivation can Achieve When motivated.
A man can achieve absolutely anything he desires so long as he/she can focus on the goal, for example, losing weight, completing a book,eliminating debt, starting a successful
blog, becoming more productive, and much more, can be achieved only through the right
motivation and sticking to it.

How does motivation work?
First, before we go into specific methods, let's define, how motivation works, what it does, and what it is.

Motivation is what drives you towards a
goal, what keeps you going when things get tough, the reason you do the things you do, like waking up early, or working late to finish a project.

There are several kinds of motivation, POSITIVE or NEGATIVE. For example, having your boss fire you is motivation - you'll likely work harder to
complete a project under this kind of pressure, but that kind of motivation is likely not as good as the positive motivation, for which if you really
want to get something done, you do it with more passion than avoiding something you don't want (such as being fired).

The best motivation, is a way for you to really want something, to be excited about it, to be passionate about it.

Remember that, as there are many other types of motivation (especially *NEGATIVE*), but to be honest, this is the kind that works best.
There is only so long that you can go trying
to motivate yourself to do something you really don't want to do, but if you find a way to really want to do something, you can sustain your effort for much, much longer.

To follow this post are 8 ways to get motivated and get doing for a successful life and living.

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What Do I Do When Everybody Disbelieved In Me?

There are moments when I see my walls cracking. There are moments when I see my feelings being diminished and I feel, my whole world is crumbling.

Friends are deserting me, even my best friend no longer sees me as a friend, I am being conspired against, I'm called a worthless fellow, a never-do-well! A mediocre, no one seems to understand me either, even my boss at work calls me names.

What Do I Do When Everybody Disbelieves in Me?
Do I have to shrink and go back to my shells? Do I even have to give up on myself? What do I do? My strength is going and I no longer can help myself!

But I think, there can be a rail of hope! I think I should perceive that soft-spot that carries my pearl... I think I should look farther and see through though darkly the thick cloud the silver lining. I think I shouldn't continue in this tunnel, I have to move on for I know that there is going to be light at the end of the it. I think, I should also see that life is not a bed of roses.

So, what do I do when everybody disbelieves in Me?

Look up to the picture above, that is your answer.

When no one else believed in me, I did!

If you believe, you can! Do you believe?

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Social Networking Weird Stories

For sometime now, a story of this nature has become so unusual on this site, but the platform which the story stands calls for sober reflection and this is the most reason why I'm bringing this to your notice.

It's quite pathetic a story that the social networks for the fact that they are contributing to making the world a small community of people who should share like minds have become places of unusual practices.

I am not against the fact that social networks can serve as avenues for making friends which would eventually lead to marriage, but on the other hand it is awkward to allow them define you relationship and how you relate with people.

We're warned about the kind of friends we make and the motive with which we delve into social networks in search of wives or husbands. Read the story below...

Social Networking Weird Story
Okadigbo,28 is in police net for killing her
married lover she met on social networking
site, Badoo..

She met the deceased who is from Ondo State
on the site in 2013 and they kicked off a
relationship without knowing he was a married
man and had hopes of getting married to him
till she found out that he was already taken
and in a fit of jealousy, organized his murder.
Her lover,Bankole Charle,an oil worker with
Halliburton Nigeria Limited, Bankole Charles,
must have thought he was playing with an
ordinary woman when he met Loretta
Odikagbo..Little did he know that the affair
would end his life,The Nation reports .

It all started when she found out that Charles
was married and when she confronted him, he
owned up to it but promised to buy her a car
as compensation but when he failed to fulfil
his promise, Okadigbo enlisted the help of one
Ime Francis Moses, and another man who is
still at large and stormed his Woji, Port
Harcourt, Rivers State residence, and ended his
life.

Odikagbo, an Ordinary National Diploma holder
in Marketing from the River State Polytechnic
(RIVPOLY), and Moses, a university drop out,
are now languishing in the cells of the State
Criminal Investigation Department (SCID), after
they were arrested following the murder of
Charles.

The SCID team traced Odikagbo to the
residence of her other boyfriend whom she was
putting up with at Rumukpokwu, Obio/Akpor
Local Government Area on December 10, last
year.

Odikagbo confessed to her crime:
"I was arrested over the death of my
boyfriend, late Charles Bankole. I conspired
with my friend and took my in-law to his
house to harass him so I could get some
money from him, which led to his death, but I
was not there when he died.

I was at the Automated Teller Machine (ATM).
There is a third person that can tell the story
of how he died but unfortunately, he has not
been arrested. So, he is not here now. This
story can't be complete if the third person is
not arrested.

I am 28 years. I met Bankole on the internet. I
initially did not know that Bankole was married;
overtime I discovered. He actually promised to
settle things with me. He talked about buying a
car. When I hinted this to my in-law (Ime), he
said he had a way to help me get what I
wanted from him and I conceded to the idea.

On the agreed day, I moved into Bankole's
house and waited for them there. He came
with another of his friend. I opened the door
for them. They came in.His junior started tying
Bankole up. Ime was holding a torch which
they came with because this happened in the
night and there was no electricity supply and it
was raining heavily.

At a point, I decided to go to the ATM with his
(Bankole's) card to withdraw some money from
his bank account. One of the two men decided
to go with me. So, my in-law (Ime) was left
behind with Bankole who was still alive when
we left.

He (Ime) later met me at the ATM point to get
some money from me. He informed me that
he called a taxi driver to carry some things
from Bankole's house. I told him that I was
going because it was already late at night.
I was arrested on December 10, brought here
(at the SCID), and showed picture of lifeless
body of Bankole. I don't know who killed him.
The relationship lasted for over a year. I am
not so certain because we related a long time
on the Internet before we met in real life."
On her reaction that the late man was
married, she said:

"I was not actually angry, but he did not just
tell me he was married. We never discussed
marriage.

At a point, we were serious with the
relationship but when I discovered his marital
status, I was disappointed and decided to pull
out to continue with my life but he insisted on
buying me a car instead to calm me down.

That was what happened.I feel so terrible and
primitive. I am guilty of the crime. Bankole was
my first Internet boyfriend; I am not used to
meeting people on the Internet orFacebook. I
blame my action on hanging out with wrong
friends."

But the Eket-born Ime gave a different account
on how Charles died, making it clear that it
was Loretta that actually killed him.Hear his
account:

"Loretta called and informed me that her
boyfriend owed her some money, which he
was supposed to use and settle her out of their
broken relationship but he was turning her up
and down.

I promised to help her get the money out from
the man. On the day agreed, she called me
and picked me up at my street junction, from
where we proceeded to pick another boy she
had earlier called for the job, but the boy came
and declined going with us.

On our way out from the boy's junction, we
met another boy who I know that loads taxi at
the junction there. I called him and she
explained to him what she wanted to do that
night; he agreed to go with us.

When we got to the man's house, she went in
while we stood under the staircase of the one-
storey building he shared with other occupants,
waiting for her instructions. I was holding a
torch light which she gave me money to buy
and a holding a car window winder, which
looked like a gun, while the boy was holding a
rope and cellotape she brought.After a while,
she came and opened the door for us. We got
in through the kitchen, where we stood before
she called us to come to the bedroom where
she was with the man.

When we stepped into the room, I pointed the
torch light on the man and told him that he
befriended our sister for such a period of time,
and pushed her out empty and without
shelter, no settlement.

The man pleaded that we should wait, that he
was going to settle her. At that point, she
started to slap the man all over his face and
used the tape to tape his mouth, after which
the other boy tied his legs and hands.

It was then she asked the man for his ATM
card and pin; she got them and went to the
ATM point with the boy, while I was left with
the man in case the pin failed. While they left
for the ATM, they carried the man's phone and
laptop.

After a while, she came back to me at the
man's house. I asked her to come let us go,
she said, 'no', that the man knows her very
well, that if we should leave him at this
junction, he will definitely come after her, and
that when he gets her, she will mention my
name. She asked if I will like to be arrested, I
said 'no'.

She now went to the man's kitchen and
brought polythene bag which she wore on the
man's head and sat on it. As the man was
struggling, I held his head until the man was
motionless.

She gave me N28, 000 only. I feel very guilty
for the action."

Many others are dying in silence!!!
And do you think it's possible to find a true and perfect match as God wants on social networks?
Share your views in the comment box.

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Photo of the Day: Rate of Nigeria's Growth 3rd in the World

Nigeria under the present administration has recorded so many achievements and we need to see them. People instead of seeing the good side of the story have been undertaken and blinded folded with the current challenges which is not a peculiar one.

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Seven Keys to Building a Lasting Relationship

Relationship to people mean different things to them. It exists in every facet of life, human existence is dependent of the kind of relationship kept.

To a social psychologist, relationship could mean the social interaction between two or more individuals. This coming together is based on the mutual interest and understanding they share which will definitely propel or serve as fuel to gear up their movement toward achieving their set goals.

Be it business or inter-personal relationship, erecting an unshakable firewall around a relationship is incumbent on the parties involved. Heating up a relationship is easier said than done anyway, but this should be noted from the onset as it will give the both parties their separate lines of contribution towards the success of such a deal.

Without much ado, let's us quickly look into the various ways we can build a long lasting relationship.

1. Definition: This should be the first consideration. Here, several questions need to be asked, like; "who are you?" "Who am I?" "What do we stand to gain from this relationship?" Etc. These questions should be asked and answered before signing up for any kind of relationship at all. Many dived into relationship anyhow and they end up losing instead of gaining. So to build a lasting relationship that would be the envy of others, first of all define it.
"Whichever level you are now, it's never too early or too late to halt and give that relationship a definition".

2. Do not think of changing. The worst thing that can happen to any relationship is when the parties involved try to change each other's line of attitude and action. Assimilation can be very perfect here as it goes a long way to prevent hurting feelings. Accept him or her just as the way he or she is.

3. Trust: The failures of the past should not be used against each other or one another as the case may be. No matter the gravity of offence, if there is understanding, then, it should kill down any form of grudge.

4. Motivation is a key! How motivated are you in your relationship? Does it propel you? Motivation is key! Are you moved to do the things you were normally unable to do? Daily inspiration would spark up a relationship and bring out the best in you.

5. Cultivate good communication skills. Don't be rude, always be courteous, welcoming and assimilative. Try to bring out the best in every speech, bury every demoralizing statement. Instead of blowing up the trumpet as "Hey, that was stupid!" You rather use something like, "I thought you could be a little bit better".

6. Before you condemn, first of all show gratitude! The worst criminal downtown would not like it if you tell him he was a criminal. The spirit of man does not accept condemnation, or unnecessary judgment or criticism, "you did this, you did that" he/or she would not like you for that! A statement like this could be endearing: "I know you're a good man, and have always been nice, but what you did in the restaurant was wrong!" With that, you would hear something like, "yes I know, I was wrong, but am sorry" cheers!

7. Be a good conflict manager. Learn how to manage conflicts. As different individuals with separate opinions about life and situations, you should go ahead to profer solutions to the problem, at this time, your partner is not the best tool to be used to tackle the challenge. Attack the issue and not your partner! Resolve it and move on.

The above seven (7) keys can be used to build a strong relationship! You know about other ways, please share with us in the comment box.

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Music: Am Grateful ft. Prophet Age by Dynamite O. | Socialetherapy

Music: Am Grateful ft. Prophet Age by Dynamite O. | Socialetherapy

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The Resolution: New Year Focus

Read the conversation between Bisi and Bisola below and drop your opinions. Please do not leave without giving us your take on the issue you will read about.

Bisi: Sola, why are you looking so pale?

Sola: Nothing, am ok.

Bisi: But your mood is a shadow of yourself...

Sola: I said am fine, thank you.

Bisi: Ok then, but you can always confide in me.

Sola: (smiling) Yea sure, that's why we're friends.

Both looked at each other and laughed out loud.

Sola: Bisi

Bisi: Yes...

Sola: (holds her hands) Sorry am not all right.

Bisi: You see, I noticed it! You keep hiding things from me! But why?

Sola: Ok, I will tell you. Among all my friends including you, I am the only virgin left. Do you think am doing the right thing? Everybody says yes, while am saying no. I look odd, think odd, behave odd and live odd. What do you think?

(She looks up and sees Bisi profusely and bitterly crying) why are you crying?

Bisi said so many things to her, which I am not going to mention here, I leave that to you. What could be your response to such? Your opinion is good enough as it can go a long way to helping people in similar life's situation.

Note that the illustration in the story is figurative.

Your opinions please.

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MUSIC: Liberty of Speech by Super Sam ft. Ola

The most awaited song from Super Sam, the rising star is here. He titled this one Liberty of Speech, he has a lot to say in this debut track which features Ola. Download the song and feel the vibe. Expect more from him!

                                      
  Liberty of Speech --------- DOWNLOAD

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Thanksgiving Message: By Sir Chris, CEO, Socialetherapy Team

Gradually the end of this wonderful year, 2014 is folding up, and the more promising year 2015 is breaking-it is indeed wonderful.

At this juncture, what else can I say than to lift up my voice and praise God for all He's done, right from the beginning of the year to this very moment, the Lord has been so gracious and His banner over me has been love. Thank you Jesus, I'm indeed grateful!

If I am to start telling of wondrous works, a thousand years would not be enough, I would rather need a thousand tongues to testify of his goodness. Despite my failures, His mercies kept me and he held me close, this is why I'm here today alive to see yet another year. Ai nya 'da! Awune nehi nehi.

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